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Contents

1. Overnight Stays
2. Contact and Foster Carers

1. Overnight Stays

1.1 Aim

We hope that this guidance will lead to an improvement in how children and young people experience being looked after by Brighton and Hove Children and Young People's City Council Children’s Services. We recognise that overnight stays can promote friendships and links in the local community and help to normalise the experience of being in care. The aim of this guidance is to provide detailed advice to social workers and carers about the law and good practice in relation to looked after children staying away from their placements overnight. Definitions of different overnight stays will be provided.

Normally, overnight stays would form a regular and natural part of a child or young person's stay in a foster family; however, as in other families, there should be no automatic entitlement to this. Carers will have to use discretion and judgement, with decisions being made in consultation with the child or young person.

1.2 Law

There is no legal requirement to carry out CRB checks on adults in households where Looked After children are staying overnight. There is also no legal requirement for overnight visitors to the foster family to be CRB checked. However, there is a general duty on the local authority to promote and safeguard the looked after child's welfare. Therefore staff should exercise their judgement according to the particular circumstances of the situation. It would also be expected that carers would act in the same way as a reasonable parent and make the same enquiries as they would if it were their own child who was staying away overnight.

In deciding whether to agree overnight stays, carers should obviously consult the child or young person and try to achieve an appropriate decision by negotiation. However it may not always be possible to do this and the carer has to make the decision in the child or young person's best interests.

1.3 Arranging Overnight Stays

Please read in conjunction with procedures in Overnight Stays and Contact with Family and Friends.

Overnight Stays are one-off stays with non-relatives, e.g. birthday parties, sleepovers and to promote developing friendships, which can be arranged by the carer for a maximum of 4 nights, if it has been previously agreed by the social worker and set out in the child's Placement Plan (recorded in the Placement Information Record).

In some circumstances, it may be necessary for the carer to refer to the social worker before agreeing to overnight stays e.g. for children subject of Care Proceedings; children with a history of absconding; children with links to risky networks. This must be set out in the Placement Plan.

In all cases where the decision is delegated to the carer, they should exercise the same level of care in making a judgement about the safety of the fostered child/young person, as they do in respect of their own child/ren .

Children staying overnight with Parents: See Contact with Parents and Siblings Procedures. No contact may be allowed unless it has been approved by the social worker and set out in the Placement Plan.

Children staying overnight with friends/relatives of their Carers as a form of babysitting

We accept that children will stay overnight with friends and relatives as a form of babysitting from time to time. This is a normal part of family life. However, the approach will be different depending on the type of placement.

In approved permanent placements, we would expect that carers should be able to make their own decisions about this. Issues about individual children's needs and attachment issues should have been addressed through the assessment and matching process.

For mainstream foster placements, children and young people should normally only stay overnight in households where the adults have been CRB checked, and following consultation by the carer with the child's social worker and the Supervising Social Worker as to the appropriateness of this.

For family and friends Carers, the supervising social worker (where there is a separate social worker for the carer) and child's social worker should be consulted by the carers. Where they have a network of friends/relatives who are likely to provide care, this should be discussed during the assessment and agreed as part of the Placement Agreement. Any adults likely to provide regular babysitting should be CRB checked.

For all types of placements, it will be important for social workers and managers to monitor the pattern of such stays and ensure they do not become a regular respite arrangement by default. If respite care is formally arranged as part of the care package, this should be subject to the appropriate monitoring and review arrangements that apply to respite care. The child's social worker and practice manager should always agree respite care arrangements for children already in foster care.

Children staying away from the placement as part of contact arrangements with other family members

Please see Contact with Parents and Siblings Procedures.

Arrangements must be approved by the social worker and set out in the child's Placement Plan (recorded in the Placement Information Record). The social worker should carry out appropriate checks (CRB, visit to house, interview of Carer), depending on the individual circumstances of the case; e.g. relationship, age of child, overall plan, one-off overnight or ongoing arrangement. There is a duty to promote contact under the Fostering Service National Minimum Standards2011 (14).

Monitoring and review

The aim of the policy is to support carers and children and young people to have as normal a life as possible. Where the decision to agree overnight stays has been delegated to the carer, it is expected that social workers would support carers in carrying this out.

The pattern of overnight stays should be looked at as part of the review process and any issues could be discussed.

In all cases, carers must keep written records of overnight stays away from the placement. In addition, these should be brought to the Looked After Child Review. Supervising social workers and the child's social worker may ask to see the records at any time.

In exceptional circumstances the child or young person may wish to use the Representations and Complaints - To Follow or consult the Children's Rights Service .

The pattern of overnight stays will also be looked at through the carer's review process and internal and external inspections.

The Fieldwork Management and Fostering and Adoption Service Management Teams will review the operation of the policy when necessary, in consultation with children and young people, Carers and Staff.

2. Contact and Foster Carers

Please read in conjunction with Contact with Parents and Siblings Procedures.

For foster carers providing short breaks, the foster carer must maintain contact as agreed in the short break plan.

The Children Act imposes a duty on local authorities to promote contact between a child who is being looked after and those connected with them. Sometimes this is voluntary and sometimes there is a Court Order.

The main points are as follows depending on the plan for the child, the purpose and nature of contact will vary. Ask the child's Social Worker to explain why a particular pattern of contact is being followed:

1. You are looking after children on behalf of others;
2. Recognise that children's parents, relatives, friends, carers and social workers have different needs and attitudes to contact;
3. Your skill, attitude and experience, patience and understanding are a powerful influence on the successful outcome of contact;
4. Take your own family's needs into account;
5. Never leave things to chance;
6. You should expect help. Do not hesitate to talk to your supervising social worker.

Contact Visits

Contact is one of the most emotional aspects of childcare - arranging for children and their families from whom they are separated to keep in touch with one another. The management of contact is one of the toughest aspects of fostering. If a child is to go home, links with their parents must be continued.

For young children where the plan is to return home, visits may be intensive and frequent.

For older children, and where the plan is not rehabilitation visits will be less frequent.

Visits should be natural and active occasions - going out, playing, etc. Contact can also mean letters or phone calls.

A good contact visit should leave the child feeling reassured that they are loved and missed by their parents and still belong to them. They will have heard about what has been going on in their family in detail and the bonds will be kept alive. If a decision is made that rehabilitation of a younger child is not in the child's interest, we will try to safeguard their future with a permanent substitute family. Children need a family to which they can belong permanently. This may mean terminating the parents' contact to the child. Even if this is the case the child still needs to know about their parents and you will need to help them understand this. If you understand the parents' situation, it is easier for you to explain kindly and truthfully to the child.

Recording Contact Visits

You should record the salient points in writing about contact visits to share with the child's social worker and your supervising social worker, and bear in mind that your records may be used in future Court proceedings. You should feel free to consult your supervising social worker if you have queries about recording contact visits or sessions. S/he can also provide you with a copy of the helpful Fostering Network booklet on recording for carers, which we circulated previously to our carers.

Shared Care - Helping Parents to Resume Responsibilities

Straightforward contact can be seen, in some cases, as the first stage towards the child's return home. If it proves unsuccessful and parents, through this and in other ways, continue to show an inability or unwillingness to care for their child, then it is likely that the child will need to be cared for longer-term, perhaps permanently. In these circumstances continued contact may be unlikely or at least reduced.

However, if contact proves successful, then a move towards the child's return home might require a period of 'shared care' between you and the child's parents. You may also be asked to offer 'shared care' to children and their parents at the beginning of the placement, especially where the child is very young and perhaps parents need help and guidance in caring for their child.

As a foster carer in this role you may have several tasks: of observing, teaching, listening and then making assessments about the parent's potential ability to cope alone.

From this it is obvious that shared care is a very difficult task and requires special skills and tolerance - caring for someone else's child is difficult enough but doing this alongside their parents makes it even harder.

Decisions about parents sharing in the day-to-day care of their child will always be part of an agreed plan; made between you, the parents and the child's social worker, at the outset of a placement.

Your task is to be open to the notion of sharing the care, even when you may not agree with it in certain instances. You may also have to tolerate parenting which is different to yours. Your observations of parent's interactions with their child must take account of the fact that 'different' methods may not necessarily equal 'bad' methods. Finally, your judgements of parent's abilities needs to be based on the notion of 'good enough parenting': that is, whilst there are some fundamental principles of 'good' parenting there can be no one set of hard and fast rules.

Rehabilitation Package After Placement

If good relationships between you and the parents have developed during the time their child was placed with you, it is possible that you may be asked to continue to help the family when the child is returned home.

This help may take several forms, for example:

• Visiting the family home on a regular basis for a defined period;
• Caring for the child for some parts of the day or at times of particular stress;
• Opening your home to parents and child to hear about the good and bad aspects of the family being reunited.

These sorts of continuing relationships often occur informally anyway but your formal agreement to it, in some situations, could speed up the child's return home and help ensure its success.

Difficulties

Parents may:

• Criticise you;
• Criticise the care you give;
• Undermine you, especially by referring to the fact that you get paid;
• Make false promises;
• Try to give up visiting because it is painful;
• Show love by buying presents;
• Be unable to play their natural roles in someone else's house;
• Be over sensitive and take your comments as criticism.

Remember to:

• Understand their situation;
• Help them to see that you understand;
• Encourage them to remain involved.

If parents turn up unexpectedly and demand to remove their child:

1. Stay calm - don't use physical restraint;
2. Try to persuade them to speak to the child's Social Worker;
3. Contact the department;
4. If necessary phone the police;
5. Don't put yourself at risk.

If a child has been out with their parents and does not return, notify the department immediately.

The Child

• Many children see their parents as who they want them to be - not what they are;
• Visits may reawaken a sense of loss;
• Visits may cause over excitement and exhaustion;
• They may openly reject you and cling to their parents;
• They may blame the parents and reject them because they are hurt;
• Visits may lead to challenging behaviour, sadness, temper tantrums, anxiety.

Remember:

• Be sensitive;
• Try to understand what the behaviour is trying to tell you;
• Don't try to pick the pieces up alone.

Foster Carer

• You may feel apprehensive;
• You may be concerned you come from different backgrounds with different values;
• You may find it difficult to be yourself and relax;
• You might find it hard not to criticise and be angry and keep your feelings to yourself;
• You may find discipline difficult when parents are around.

Remember:

• The child in care is still the parents' child;
• You are a responsible and professional adult in a very sensitive situation;
• Be sensitive towards the parents and the child's feelings;
• Be aware of your own feelings;
• Don't contradict the parents in front of the child - involve them;
• The child needs you to accept their parents because they are part of them;
• Let your own negative feelings out safely and away from the child;
• Talk to your supervising social worker. You are not alone in picking up the pieces after difficult visits.

A child's parents will always be important to them. They may want to talk to you about them and clarify their feelings. Be honest and truthful and gentle - they may feel loyalty to them even if they are angry.

Working with the child, family (including grandparents and half-siblings) and friends Good Practice Arrangements for contact visits will be made at the Placement Planning Meeting at the start of the placement. Make sure the arrangements suit everybody. There will be practical implications and you will need to minimise disruption and intrusion to other members of your family.

Everything needs to be written down so that all involved are clear about what has been agreed.

If a child is at risk of harm and the parent unpredictable or aggressive contact may take place on neutral ground and would be supervised.

The Importance of Sharing Information

Where carers look after a child where race, religion, culture or language is not their own, the parents and families have invaluable information that can help the child maintain and develop important parts of their life.

Disabled children particularly need their parents and carer to share information so that their needs can be met.

End